Short Divorce Jokes for Women
{YBA} Divorce Jokes Jokes about Divorce
1. What Do You Call a Blonde with 90% of Her Intel
Q: What do you call a blonde with 90% of her intelligence gone?
A: Divorced.
2. A guy Walks Into a Post Office
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over
them.
His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing.
The man says, I’m sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, ‘Guess who?.
But why? asks the man.
I’m a divorce lawyer, the man replies.
3. Fair Settlement
After a lengthy conference with the estranged husband, the lawyer reported to
his client.
Mrs. LaMay, I have succeeded in making a settlement with your husband that is eminently fair to both of you.
Fair to both?. exploded Mrs. LaMay. I could have done that myself. What do you think I hired a lawyer for?
4. Lena’s Divorce
The judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, who had charged non-support. He said to Ole, I have decided to give your wife $400 a month for support.” “Vell, dat’s fine, Judge, said Ole. And vunce in a while I’ll try to chip in a few bucks myself.
5. Maiden Name Reinstated
Once my divorce was final, I went to the local Department of Motor Vehicles and asked to have my maiden name reinstated on my driver’s license.
Will there be any change of address?” the clerk inquired.
No, I replied.
Oh, good, she said, clearly delighted. You got the house.
6. What do You Call an Unmarried Blond in a BMW?
Q: What do you call an unmarried blond in a BMW?
A: A divorcee
7. Lemons Jokes
A woman went to a Florida lemon grove to apply for a job, but the foreman thought she seemed way too qualified for the position. Do you even have any actual experience picking lemons? he asked.
Well, I think I do. she replied. I’ve been divorced three times.
8. Barbies – Divorced Jokes
A Lady goes to Toys R Us to buy a Barbie doll. She tells the clerk that she needs to buy a Barbie but doesn’t know what’s available or price.
The clerk replies “we have Tennis Barbie and she’s $28” Lady asks “well, anything else?” “We have an equestrian Barbie, and she’s $28”.
Lady asks anything else? Well, we have divorced Barbie and she’s $250
The lady replies “I don’t understand why divorced Barbie is so expensive.
The others were only $28. What is so special about divorced Barbie? The clerk replied Simple, she comes with Ken’s car, his house, and all his other stuff.
9. Be My Valentine
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing Love stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them.
His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says, I’m sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, ‘Guess who?.
But why? asks the man.
I’m a divorce lawyer, the man replies.
